<?xml version="1.0" encoding="UTF-8"?><!-- generator="WordPress/2.6.2" -->
<rss version="0.92">
<channel>
	<title>Things I Heard</title>
	<link>http://thingsiheard.com</link>
	<description>Things Overheard as I Travel through my Life and the City</description>
	<lastBuildDate>Sun, 13 Jul 2008 09:43:36 +0000</lastBuildDate>
	<docs>http://backend.userland.com/rss092</docs>
	<language>en</language>
	
	<item>
		<title>Too Pretty for Porn?</title>
		<description><![CDATA[I heard that a friend was a porn star. I need to qualify a few things: by &#8220;heard,&#8221; I mean that I first saw him&#8211;ahem&#8211;perform years ago and my suspicions that this might be the same person were confirmed by listening to the conversations of others; by &#8220;friend,&#8221; I mean someone who runs in my [...]]]></description>
		<link>http://thingsiheard.com/2008/07/too-pretty-for-porn/</link>
			</item>
	<item>
		<title>Hookers Hurt by High Gas Prices</title>
		<description><![CDATA[I heard that the world&#8217;s oldest profession is affected by the rise in gas prices. Really.
I heard the story on CNN yesterday and immediately ran to the website to see if it was online. There is a God in Heaven. You can read the article entitled &#8220;Brothels &#8216;double your stimulus&#8217; plan fights fuel crisis.&#8221;
Reading it, [...]]]></description>
		<link>http://thingsiheard.com/2008/06/hookers-hurt-by-high-gas-prices/</link>
			</item>
	<item>
		<title>The Commotion in the Courtyard</title>
		<description><![CDATA[I heard a commotion in the courtyard on Friday night. The same courtyard that served as (apparently) the most appropriate venue for my downstairs neighbors to engage in a late-night verbal battle.
But this was commotion. You know, that strange disturbance in the force; that split second before an earthquake hits when you can hear the [...]]]></description>
		<link>http://thingsiheard.com/2008/06/the-commotion-in-the-courtyard/</link>
			</item>
	<item>
		<title>Talk Radio Proves Again that Some People Are Just &#8220;Stoopid&#8221;</title>
		<description><![CDATA[Yesterday, I heard a woman call in to a radio show discussing yesterday&#8217;s Supreme Court decision related to gun rights. Conversation paraphased below.
Caller: I support today&#8217;s decision. And I remember that I read in Freakenomics that more people die in backyard swimming pools than from guns? So, therefore shouldn&#8217;t we legislate pools?
Lawyer that actually defended gun [...]]]></description>
		<link>http://thingsiheard.com/2008/06/talk-radio-proves-again-that-some-people-are-just-stoopid/</link>
			</item>
	<item>
		<title>Yeah, I am making fun.</title>
		<description><![CDATA[I found these on a website that popped up in the search engine. I thought they were too funny to pass up. In keeping with the policy of this site, these are actual questions, written by actual internet teens from 2003. Kind of makes you wonder what kind of adult sexual beings they turned into.
I [...]]]></description>
		<link>http://thingsiheard.com/2008/06/yeah-i-am-making-fun/</link>
			</item>
	<item>
		<title>Neighbors Arguing</title>
		<description><![CDATA[I heard my neighbors arguing late last night. The fight started in the courtyard of my apartment complex and spilled into the driveway. There was silence. And then it started again. She yelled at him from their apartment door and he yelled at her from the middle of the courtyard. I tried to understand what [...]]]></description>
		<link>http://thingsiheard.com/2008/06/neighbors-arguing/</link>
			</item>
	<item>
		<title>I Heard the Firetrucks</title>
		<description><![CDATA[I heard the sirens bleed through the air five or six minutes after I first smelled the hint of a fire. I smelled the fire 30 seconds after my roommate asked me if I smelled something burning. Originally, I thought it was the overheated, burnt coffee that festered in the bottom of the pot for [...]]]></description>
		<link>http://thingsiheard.com/2008/06/i-heard-the-firetrucks/</link>
			</item>
	<item>
		<title>My Tragic Neighbor</title>
		<description><![CDATA[I heard my neighbor vomiting.
There&#8217;s a woman that lives in the complex across the alley. Multiple times a week, I hear her hurl into the toilet. Two or three times a week, she gets on her knees and prays to the Porcelain God.
Hearing a person vomit is an odd experience. At the very least, it [...]]]></description>
		<link>http://thingsiheard.com/2008/06/my-tragic-neighbor/</link>
			</item>
	<item>
		<title>Racial Slurs</title>
		<description><![CDATA[I heard a racial slur. It was directed at me.
There&#8217;s this taco restaurant that my partner and I frequent in Los Angeles. Some nights, when we walk to a bar and walk home, we&#8217;ll stop in and have a late night snack. (Of course, this &#8220;snack&#8221; involves burritos the size of a grown man&#8217;s forearms, [...]]]></description>
		<link>http://thingsiheard.com/2008/06/racial-slurs/</link>
			</item>
	<item>
		<title>My Nympho Neighbor</title>
		<description><![CDATA[I heard my neighbor having sex yesterday. It was during the middle of the day in the middle of the week. And I heard her moan and groan and &#8216;ooh&#8217; and &#8216;aah.&#8217; I live in an apartment complex and my exterior wall faces an alley of sorts (in fact is just the driveway to the [...]]]></description>
		<link>http://thingsiheard.com/2008/05/my-nympho-neighbor/</link>
			</item>
</channel>
</rss>
